Unbelievable New Ghost Ranch Finds (joke)

[MKIRKALDY@aol.com]

Ghost Ranch, New Mexico (embargoed until 10/31/98)  
Dr. Dave Alsaynts of Cape Town University announced today the 
discovery of several new dinosaurs.

Hollow _Einiosaurus_ bones were found in association with seeds, 
fibers and a waxy coating.  Slices are being CAT-scanned.

_Celinedeinonychus_ - Fossilized heart found preserved several meters 
beyond the skeleton.  Strong indication of catastrophic flood event, with 
water seepage into the chambers, although specimen probably had 
been previously smothered.

_Armageddodon_ - Large holes evident when plotting the find.  Long, 
slow-moving but destructive tail.

_Pamandersonia_ - A broadbreasted, primitive-brained brooder.

_Bradpsittacosaurus_ - One male and several adolescent females 
found in this grouping.  

_Edmontoclintonia_ - Found under elliptical dung heap, which the
animal seems to have fallen into but elected not to climb out of.

_Kenstyraccosaurus_ - Discovered in association with the 
Edmontoclintonia.  Likely another "fighting specimens."  Death 
pose suggestive of an independent ambush predator.

_Caudiptertripp_ - Claws from this specimen found embedded in 
the backs of several other dinosaurs in the bonebed.

_Mickeoraptorowe_ - "Dawn List Owner"  Large thread-killing claw.  

_Pawpawlajones_  (paw paw la HOE ness) -  Extraordinarily long 
snout, respiratory turbinates preserved.  An early Duck Bill.

_Protarchaeopterwich_ - Gliding flyer, pointed head crest, found 
with Catasaurus.

_Lewinskylosaur_ - Robust, with a deep throat pouch, lips and 
cheeks.  Paleo artists adding these ex/internal features to their
restorations.

Reported by Mary
mkirkaldy@aol.com